Stress from Expectations

Storming into my room angrily, I slammed the door shut and threw myself down on the bed. I could hear voices in my head. “You did not do this”, “Why did you this?”, “You have wasted all this time”, “Look what have you done”. My mind was in utter chaos. I could no longer take this daily bickering. It was unbearable.

How many times do you think you have been in a similar situation? How many times have you wanted to cut yourself off from the world and its do’s and don’ts, nags and wags, expectations and perceptions?

Family, friends and society prescribe us on how we ought to live, act and think. Our mind is conditioned to that. But when the actual action differs, it leads to friction.  Continual friction leads to stress. Stress is also caused when there is always a gap between our expectation from us and the actual result. The gap is branded as failure or mistake.

Then others keep harping on it. They point out the fact that it is wrong or it should have been done this way or that. They do not realize that since it has already occurred, nothing can be done to change it now. They may be correct. But they do not really help us by pointing our mistake and failure to us all the time. It only helps to add to the stress that is already present in our life.

Few years back, stressed out from others’ expectation, I was completely stoned. For a while, I did not know what to do. I wanted some peace, some time off, alone, in my own company. Then I realized that one cannot remain cutoff from the world for ever. I re-organized myself. Re-prioritized my goals and started again. And a new beginning it was.

Everything in life is an experience. A mistake or a failure, just as success, is a judgment of someone on something. If you think that it was a genuine mistake on your part, don’t get stressed. Just learn from the failure. Set new goals and move on. This way, the lesson is not lost.